Jezebel this article appeared and struck a cord of sticky truth with me. It's all too true that we worry too much about fitting an image or toning down our splintery bits so that we can stop offending and snag a mate. But we utterly fail. Every. Time. Even in the geek community we suffer from this plague of insecurity and constant attempts to morph into something "more acceptable". I can assure all of you, from my experience with geek coupling, that no matter how opinionated, bitchy, strange, fat, thin, weird you feel you are....there is a person out there who will love you that you in turn...will love back. Geeks are simply exceptionally quirky humans looking for other quirky humans and it doesn't matter if your ass is fat or you rant about sexism in LOTR.
Fact: A Jedi costume is flattering on any shape.
If you happen to get the rare douchebag variety geek with arrogant expectations that he deserves a super model just move on. There will be another sweet, intellectual pussy cat just around the corner who will think you are an intergalactic goddess. Just keep throwing those twelve sided di until you get the right partner for your quest.
For Chrissakes, There Is Nothing Wrong With You: A Dating Manifesto
By Lindy West
As modern ladies of marrying age, our trusty inadequacy paradigm has always gone something like this: "I'm too fat for the men I like." "I'm too ugly to get married." "I'm too old to find a guy." Blah blah blah, fart, repeat, dead (the lifecycle of the human woman). And lately, this other sort of protest-too-much inversion seems fashionable: "I'm too smart/too pretty/too successful/too interesting/too funny/too outspoken to bag a man!" No matter what or who we (hetero) women are, we are always too something for men. Isn't that just fucked? Because to be "too" something implies that there's a something else out there to aim for. But there isn't. IT'S A TRAP.
We constantly frame ourselves as outsized or undersized from every angle—and we either use our inadequacies to punish ourselves (too fat! No cookie!), or wear them like some crazy cold-comfort security blanket (you're my real boyfriend, sarcasm!). So couldn't we just call bullshit on this entire idea and be, I don't know, people? People who don't exist "for" men? Whose lives aren't upended by the latest terrible "too"-ness we read about in Cosmo?
Read the rest HERE.